Sadness comes to us all—in grief, heartbreak, and trauma. Yet, many are unaware of how to be sad. They live in desperation for their sadness to end and hope it never returns. But it will return. Do you really think you were going to live out the rest of your life without anything bad happening?
So, how do you be sad?
Simple. You just feel it—watching it change—until, eventually, it disappears. I understand that it is easier said than done. But true suffering can only come from thoughts about sadness.
Just had a breakup?
You are going to feel a certain way—a lack of energy, an inability to concentrate, a heavy sensation permeating your body. But that is not true suffering. And it certainly isn’t unbearable. You are bearing it at this moment.
What causes suffering is the constant rumination over past arguments, wondering what you could have done differently, what you should have said or not said. At this moment, all of that is futile. Once you find yourself in the midst of these thoughts, you can pull away and return to just feeling the core sensations—without always having to explain the pain to yourself, as though that would even make sense. You are both the audience and the speaker. If you are the one thinking the thought, must you really continue explaining it to yourself?
All you have is your mind in each moment.
Life is full of pain, sadness, and moments of joy. Equip yourself to sail through the sadness so that you are better able to enjoy the good moments.
This, too, shall pass.